"All This Greatness Is Wearing Me Down"

I am grateful for my mother giving birth to me. She is living her life with epilepsy and still struggles to make ends meet just so she can make a better life for her and her kids. I am grateful for the fact that even though I talk back to her, yell, and ignore her, she still has the patience to see what is really under all my hostility. My mother deserves so much more than how I treat her and she still loves me no matter what.

I am grateful for my father because even though I am a child of seven he still takes time out of his day to make sure each and every one of his kids are taking care of and appreciated the same. My father deals with high blood pressure and has trouble with his temper but when he is with family he acts like one of the kids and makes everybody laugh. I do not know where I would be if I never had my father in my life because I would lose the part of me that makes me laugh, cry, and be human.

I am grateful for my sister because even though she can be an evil dictator she’s still the person that gets me through the hardships of being a teenager. Growing up with a sickness that had her in pain for some time in her life really show me that I can do anything I want to do. Now that she is having a baby and is at high risk because of her sickness I know that she is tough and can withstand anything. My sister is about seven and a half months pregnant and getting stronger everyday knowing that she needs to bring her child into the world. I am so grateful to call her my sister because without her I think I would have shut myself out from the world.

I am grateful for my life, my home, my family, and the world. I’m grateful that I still have my education and that I’m smart enough to understand what is happening around me and how I can get through it. I love my life as it is now and I hope that there would be positive changes in the near future to overcome the negative.

" Love Me or Love Me Not" paper 2

The key to finding true happiness in a romantic relationship is by loving and accepting one’s true character. Having unconditional love is a statement of fact that a person should be loved unconditionally no matter the flaws involved. William Shakespeare once quoted that love to faults is always blind, always inclined, and breaks all chains from every mind. This quote means that people tend to overlook the flaws in their loved one’s characteristics, that love has no rules or boundaries; people just love. Loving someone for who they are and not what makes them who they are is the key to true happiness.

“Unconditional love” is loving someone regardless of their faults, misguided actions, qualities, etc. The term normally refers itself to a parents love for their child, but it is also true for relationships of romantic sentiment? For romantic relationships the number one question to be asked is if the two persons involved would be able to love unconditionally because everyone has flaws; nobody’s perfect. Tal Ben-Shahar questioned himself on what it means to be loved by “who we really are” (Ben-Shahar p. 113).  Do we throw around the term for moral support, someone else’s self-enjoyment or do we really mean it when we say we love someone?

A man named Paul Sunstone had a situation where someone loved him for what they thought he should be not for who he was. He stated how a person could have intense feelings for their lover even though they see them as someone else (Sunstone p. 1). Love in a relationship is about trust and honesty throughout problems and complications, so for loving someone because they remind a person of a past or present affiliation is not love; it’s a type of obsession. Tal Ben-Shahar stated that we are taught o love with our hearts now with our minds, and in Paul’s case he got the opposite of what love is (Ben-Shahar p. 113). It is hard to question whether people love someone or merely the idea of them because there is no easy answer. People have their own mentality of how love goes, how they express their love, their own reason for it.

William Shakespeare once quoted that love to faults is always blind, always inclined, and breaks all chains from every mind. He’s saying how relationships are all about openness and no boundaries to what’s being said or not said. The flaws that a person may possess should be overlooked, pushed aside, to be able to see what’s really there. A relationship is based on truth, honesty, trust, and commitment. There are no rules to how much you can love, just that we all love for the right reasons.

Unconditional love is so different from the kind of love most people have known all their lives; “Real Love”. Real love is caring about another person’s happiness without second guessing yourself about what you need; it’s what they need that comes first. Its real love when the other person cares about our happiness unconditionally. In order to find a real kind of love like that a person must first love themselves unconditionally or achieving any sort of goal in a relationship would be a lie because a person can’t begin to love another if they don’t love themselves.

People sometimes wan that kind of happiness because they see it as a relief, and so they get married. They feel that excitement when they confess their undying love for each other, saying how their hopes and dreams have been fulfilled but in the end after all of it is over they still feel the same way they did before marriage. “Marriage is not the key to happiness”, stated Anne Becker. Married people are no more happier than singles (Becker p. 58). People think hat by getting married they could reach that level of happiness that they have been striving for when they started a relationship. There is excitement in the beginning but after all the fireworks and confetti have stopped everything goes back to the way it used to be before.

Some people think that just being in a relationship with someone would bring them happiness, make them feel like they’re worth something, but doesn’t “Love” have a say in the matter. Just jumping in a situation where love is blind doesn’t make a happy ending for any persons involved, just a horrible beginning. Daniel Gilberts facts on Impact-bias relates to this type of relationship. Impact –bias is when we want something that we think is going to make us happy (Gertner p. 8) but in the end we just feel the same as we did when we didn’t have what we wanted. How can unconditional love fall into a category relationship if the people involved are only there for self-enjoyment, for the fame of being in a relationship?

So the key to finding true happiness in a romantic relationship is by loving and accepting one’s true character, by loving them for who they are as well as loving yourself. William Shakespeare’s quote on love is based on the statement “Real love has no bounds” because relationships are based on love, trust, and honor. Finding the right person that can make someone second guess their belief on love and turn it around into something special is Unconditional love. Knowing that the person can love beyond hardships and see past the difficulties that graced the other person’s past is called unconditional love. So finding the key t true happiness is not easy or hard, people just have to be willing to take the risk and open up their heart.                                                             

Random Free Write-just sharing my thoughts

Hey Diary

                I’m writing you to say that I’m having a thought of how relationships really work. Do people just fall in love at first sight or do it time like weeks or years. I fell in love in about a month before and I thought that he was just for me, I thought that we was going to last longer that the universe but I later figured out that it was just my subconscious speaking. My mind had a dream that it wanted to live out so it lived it out in me and made me think that suck a fantasy existed. I feel as if I will never find salvation in this world if I never find love. I’m not talking about family, not talking about friends; I’m talking about real love that you hear about in stories of some girl as the victim of a fatal mugging or possible hardship and a big strapping man comes to save her from her problems that she tries to work out herself. I had true love before when I met my other half. His name was Kay and I thought he was the best thing in the world that I ever laid eyes on and when I was with him I was whole. He hurt me in the end when he started distancing himself from me, from our relationship; but I knew it wasn’t his fault. I think it was me, my subconscious thought that I was capable of loving, but I knew the truth, I was just incapable of being human.

"I've Lost My Mind"

 Today I found out that I might be studying from the wrong major. I took a test or random questions about who I am and what kind of person I am and the end results were not surprising. Technically I’m a Guardian sworn to protect the lives of people from harming their social lives and giving them the justice they need, or something cool like that. I am confused about it because I’ve sworn my life to helping out animals and giving a new and better life but from the results I’ve seen I have more than one opportunity to be something else in life. My friends told me that I’m great at giving advice and from what i seen of the results and being interviewed I’ll be really good at counseling or debating. Thinking about my future has put me in a little tailspin of what I can possibly pursue in the future. I just hope I make the right choice.

"FLIPPING BURGERS IS BELOW ME..COLLEGE I SEE"

Having a job is great and all when you want to keep a little something in your pocket but does that mean you’re going to keep that job forever. Having a job just to make ends meet is not always going to end well because it’s just another job; not an actual career. For a student its better for them to find a job close to what their major is because they’re getting the experience to observe how they can turn that little job into a career. People tend to get jobs that have nothing to do with what they want to pursue in the future so how can that make them happy. The title to the lifetime goal is “The pursuit of Happiness”, so why go for an opportunity that will push you back.

Tony Robbins video talk about the need for “spirit” to help us grow into ourselves and basically discover what we need. I had trouble deciding what I want to do with my life and I still am. Struggling with myself because I want to be two things at once and having a hard time choosing which college I want to go to after school. In the end though I know I’m going to make a great choice no matter what because whichever way I go I’ll be doing something I love. I’ll work my way toward my goal by finding opportunities to help me along the way.  Majoring to be a Vet-Technician and trying to pursue a career in zoology is tough but I know I’m going to succeed because of so many jobs and careers out there that I can apply for to get that experience, that feeling, to reach my goal.

I still have a way to go before I get what I worked hard for but it will end well because I’ve reached my “spirit”. Students should have happiness in their lives whether it is at school, home, or work. It’s not always easy just figuring out what you want in life because there are obstacles in the way that have to be solved first before you find what is right. The success that’s reached in the end is worth it, it will be long but hey you’ll be happy with the results.

" IMA READER MANIAC..MANIAC" BLOG 3

Reading books and Writing stories makes me Happy. Going to class and listening to a teacher talk about reading books and writing doesn’t. In “Happiness and Education” Tal Ben-Shahar talks about how there are two different kinds of students in Education which are Lovemaking models and Drowning models. The lovemaking models thrive for education; they love learning new things and seeking out the pleasures that benefit from it. Drowning models, like myself, lack the integrity to actually commit to doing any work at all that doesn’t make them happy. I read about 5 different books at a time but to have to go to class and told by a teacher to read a book for that class in not something that I’ll enjoy.  I seek my own pleasures in doing something for myself that I ended up abusing it.

I remember how I always used to hate going to math class in high school and how I used to always skip and sit in someone else’s class. Knowing that I wasn’t achieving anything by ditching my academic studies to sit it one of my friends class and watch them learn didn’t faze me until I had to take a test for it. Seeing my downfall I felt like I destroyed any chance of being a better person and making my family proud. I felt as if school was a burden, a curse, that I had to do and I expressed that feeling by skipping. When Tal Ben-Shahar spoke about “Lovemaking models” and “Drowning models” in his article “Happiness in Education” I thought about my time as a student in high school.

In my years at being in high school I loved reading books that I felt I could relate to. I read books in math class, art class, music class, not science class because I was always on point there but any other class I had I read books in. In my mind I could enjoy reading books all the time because that’s what made me happy in an institution that made me feel caged. I was a drowning model when it came to English class because I never wanted to listen to the teacher talk about the book we were supposed to read or the questions that we needed to answer. I enjoyed reading books that I preferred for myself instead of the ones chosen for me, and that was my downfall.

When I saw my grades at the end of my junior year I finally saw what I needed to do and how I needed to do it. I came back to school my senior year and started putting myself out there on how much I love books and learning. At the end of my dramatic change I ended up graduating most improved in high school because I put what I enjoyed so much to good use. The look on my families faces when I was called up for my award was so heartwarming that I cried. Now looking back at that memory I figured out that in seeing as how I was on the border line of failing in school I made myself work hard at doing what I was supposed to and seen that I actually enjoy the work that was given to me. I ended up turning into a Lovemaking model because I understood that I could make my education fun if I turned away from the negative aspects about school and focused instead on the beneficial opportunities that I can get from achieving goal.

Tal Ben-Shahar said that his brother loved to study psychology but hated it as a student. If people stop and think about how much easier or better school can be if what you already know is put out there then that’s better for them. Students focus on school in a negative way because that’s all they see it as when they’re assigned to do so much work. That’s what my mindset was focused on when I was in high school. My only thoughts was that I had to do work all the time and projects and papers; so I just stopped all together and starting living a life I though made me happy. Seeing the outcome of my ways made my education look like elementary so I gave myself a pity talk and got to doing what was right. Reading is fun when you do it as a group because there is so much things that you can learn from what other people say. Reading motivates me in having a happier education.

Being a college student showed me that I can make it somewhere in life and that I don’t want to be on a path that  leads me into situations that I can’t get out of. I love my education and I love the different people that I get to see every day when I go to school. I now see that reading so much was the best thing I did in high school because it led me to where I am today. I limit myself to how much I read and what I read to make room for much more important things in life like my education. All in all though I know that I can’t let what I enjoy most control what I need the most. Education can have happiness; I just can’t let what I need berate what I know.  

"Ashley's World" blog 2

“Hey class I want you to write a fifteen page paper on Beauty, on how you see Beauty, on how you think it affects us in a literal sense compared to what some people might think is Beautiful to them and then make sure that you identify the human characteristic that possesses…” blah blah blah ! Who seriously wants to hear all that rambling going on and on and on about fifteen pages GET OUT! Not everybody is too happy about that...well except for that kid bouncing up and down in his seat…Oh My Goodness. Does Education contain any ounce of Happiness that could make an individual constantly crave it? In “Happiness and Education” Tal Ben-Shahar discusses the difference between a Lovemaking model in which a person basically has no qualms about writing thousands of pages for class and always enjoys new ways to enhance their education, and a Drowning model which is someone who feels as if the pressure is always on them and actually attempting to submit themselves to the work is not always accurate. Maybe some people love absorbing the pleasure of learning new things and hands on creativity, but for me it’s a little different because I just can’t wait to get home crack open that good old workbook and fall asleep (Warning-drooling may be possible).

Tal Ben-Shahar talked about how his brother loved to study Psychology at Harvard and how he spent his free time reading, writing, brainstorming, all that good stuff, but in the end his brother didn’t like it as a student. Maybe his brother felt as if he was put under pressure to study even harder about the subject he loves and felt as if there is no happiness in having to constantly research it and write pages on it, etc.  Maybe Shahar’s brother loved the fact that he can easily do what he has to in class in his own atmosphere, in his own time when he feels better about studying and gathering information about it. Students tend to go toward the bad side in education where they feel as if it’s a waste of their free time and there’s no fun in what’s being taught. Even if the class is fun in the end when you go home and is asked how your day was you’ll probably say it was boring...walk in your room and mope.

I know that one of my favorite subjects is English and I can’t stop reading if my life depending on it. After coming home from school I literally walk into my house start up my PC and read stories on it all day or I just write about what's on my mind. When it comes to going to class for English I can’t stand it because I don’t enjoy it as much unless the teacher makes it fun. I can call myself a drowning model because I don’t like to do work unless it benefits me in my own time…in "Ashley’s World". I think that Shahar’s brother was a drowning model because he loved to study up on Psychology all the time, in his time. He disliked it as a student but loved it as a way of entertaining himself when he’s alone or sharing his views with people who’ll listen. I’ve had teachers who made English very enjoyable and others who made me want to set my ears on fire so I won’t have to listen to what they say, but when the time comes for me to go home and all that educational work for class has been done and put away…Ashley time is on and it doesn’t stop.

I had a little Lovemaking thing going on when I was in science class, and before you get all scared and hightail it, I was talking about the subject. I Love…Love…Love…absolutely Love Science. I don’t care if it’s in my spare time or in school I’ll listen to anybody who’s willing to share some views about anything related to science. It’s my dream to be a science major but my problem is that I just don’t know what part I want to major in. Science is really my Educational Happiness because I can’t live in a world without it which is impossible because the world wouldn’t be here without it. I don’t feel pressured into the subject and if anybody asked me a question about science I won’t put up a fuss in answering them. I see now that Tel Ben-Shahar is right and there is some Happiness in Education… you just have to be willing to find it in yourself.